We’ve heard the cliches from people planning weddings: “I’m just ready for the wedding to be over.” and “We should just elope!” Most of our engagement, even thought parts have been extremely frustrating, I have managed to avoid saying these things. The past couple weeks, though, I have at least been telling a few people, “I am just ready to be on the beach in Hawaii.” Part of this is because, even though we still have a lot of things to do before the wedding, the list is now at the point where we COULD rush and do it pretty quickly if we had to. It’s also nice to remember that after the stress of planning, I will be laying on a beautiful beach– and soon! I don’t want it to just be OVER though– I want to be present for the rest of our engagement AND the wedding! And I AM excited for that part too! I’m excited for lots of friends and family to be here and for the wedding itself. I should start telling people that instead of the more negative-sounding, “I just want to be on the beach.” I don’t want to just be ready for the wedding to be here either, though. I want to enjoy the next couple months of being engaged. Sometimes married couples say things like, “Before we were married…” or “When we were engaged…” and it’s cool to think about that time they’re talking about is NOW! So here’s a little meditation on all of this:
Sit quietly and pay attention to your breathing.
As your thoughts start to quiet, pay attention to your body. Are you hot or cold? Are you tired or energetic? Don’t try to change these things, just notice them.
As you sit, noticing your breath and your body, slowly start to think about your emotions in this moment.
If you are excited, you can say to yourself, “I am getting married soon and I am excited.”
If you are nervous, you can say to yourself, “I am getting married soon and I am nervous.”
If you are stressed out, you can say to yourself, “I am getting married soon and I am stressed out.”
If you have a number of feelings rush to the surface, try to name each one.
Don’t try to change your feelings. Just notice them.
Try not to get caught up in why you feel the way you feel. If you find your mind starting to wander, take a breath and come back to your breathing.
Breathe in and smile. You are here right now.
Breathe out and remember this is a wonderful moment. You have already arrived.